My Baby’s In Utero Photos

last saturday, Dec. 5, the whole family trooped to The Medical City, to have my baby photographed via 4D ultrasound.

Daddy and kids were there, like a bunch of kids in a school bus — noisy, agitated, excited. but alas, Baby was NOT in the mood for some photo ops, even with the whole bunch’s presence. he was in prone (backside) position. the doctors advised me to take a few minutes walk and return after the baby has moved. we went back to ultrasound queue to have another photo taken but to no avail.

everyone went home disappointed.

finally, yesterday, Daddy and i went back to The Medical City to try the 4D ultrasound again. and yes, we were successful after 2 attempts. the first attempt, Baby was covering his face with both hands and feet (imagine that!). we were able to finally determine the gender of our little one — HE IS A BOY! but then, since he is still not in the mood for picture-taking, i had to take another walk somewhere and really TALKED to Baby to be cooperative.

i told Baby that it didn’t matter to me that he was a boy, we accept him and love him all the same. we initially wished for a girl, but God gave us a boy and it wouldn’t matter to the world as long as he’s healthy and strong and happy. finally, Baby loosened up a little bit, and there, the pictures were taken.

the sonologist/OB-gyne was very excited to see his face, finally, after 3 attempts and said she couldn’t move out of excitement. she kept on taking pictures of Baby’s face and commented on his prominent nose and lips and cheeks. it was an absolute joy to hear her say, ‘Mommy, you have such a beautiful child!’ (her exact words:’ Mommy, ang ganda ng baby mo!’). i didn’t think she was humoring us or just making-bola, i know i do have a beautiful baby growing inside! 

as promised, here is my baby’s first photo in utero… 

Baby Noe’s first photo!

Baby Noe looks a lot like Ate Chloe, Kuya Duds and Kuya Troe. again, my recessive genes gave in to Daddy’s dominant traits for a better result!

ahhh..  the joy of motherhood!

Just Some Thoughts…

sorry again for the long lull…

i have been logging into this blog and creating posts but i can’t seem to find the time to finish them. all of the thoughts i have written would be a waste if i’ll just delete them. 

so, here…  snippets of thoughts i had for the past few months, hoping to finally make you understand what is going on inside me.  

written 2009-06-01 @15:14:00

tell me of misery. of sadness. of warfare and desolation.

tell me of times where there is no life. where nothing important matters to who you really are.

not even success. or wealth. or knowledge. 

misery completes the picture.  

 

the person that you really are do not set you apart from your misery.

[whatever the feelings  i had on this day reflects a rather gloomy perspective. gladly, it’s just the rush…]

o ~ 0 ~ o

written 2009-06-03 @12:16:00

i’m still crazy about going back to school.

but i can’t seem the find the time or energy or the hard push to get there or to get moving.

 

i am at a threshold asking whether i ‘want’ to or i ‘need’ to.  want is something superficial, like gushing for that candy. need is something deeper, as in one cannot live without it. at present, i’m at the stage where i am in deep want of something to disturb my mediocre corporate life. i want something to excite me, and going back to school will really speed me up.

  

either way, it will benefit me entirely.  

[this post was weeks before i learned i am pregnant…]

o ~ 0 ~ o

2009-07-31 13:28:00

i just sooo L-O-V-E my kids!!!

 

they are growing up so fast and growing up to be good-natured and cool kids. though they still have their unique naughty notions, one cannot discount the fact that their genes were strewn out of mine. we share the same smile, laughter, funny faces. and we love making fun of ourselves without getting too emotional or onion-skinned. they loved laughing loudly and laughing their hearts out.

they aren’t afraid to show their weaknesses, not afraid to be caught in an uncompromising position because of their actions. they aren’t afraid to show their feelings at me and towards me. and yes, they can be subversive sometimes,  but that is probably my trait and they got it from me.

they make me feel loved all the time. they love to hug me so tight and kiss me like babies (even if they are all too grown up now to kiss their mom like babies!). they are expressive in sharing their thoughts and feelings at me because i encourage them to speak up about what they feel. for example, i tell them: ‘tell me what you feel coz i am not a fortune-teller and i hate guessing games.’

o ~ 0 ~ o

2009-08-04 13:14:00

this pregnancy thing is really peculiar.

 

i had my 3 kids born consecutively almost every year and rarely felt any peculiarities and cravings on the first quarter of pregnancy. but this one is notably annoying.

foremost, my mornings are dependent on her (let’s assume she’s a she…). either that i’d roll out of bed gracefully or i’d roll out of it bummed. either that i have a terrible headahe or that i am heady and geared completely.

i hate all kinds of BAD smell! i don’t like eating the food i cooked and would rather eat out and buy fastfood. 

i am  crazy about japanese food especially sashimi in kikoman and wasabe! i crave for it almost everyday. most days, FRUITS are my companion especially watermelons! 

 

[yes, the peculiar feeling is still going on inside me like ‘first time’. sometimes, i feel like such a bum… but then again, i feel that i have a rather glowing aura, which some deduce as a certain ‘coming of age in pregnancy’ which to me is a positive thing… ] 

Motherhood (again)

sometimes life plays a trick on you…

remember my previous post on remission? i exhaled a lot of negative thoughts in that particular post, not really caring whether someone get hurt in the process. and i don’t regret the exhale.

hubb expressed bitter regrets for what he’s done, and i have forgiven his shortcomings (though, as i said, it cannot easliy be forgotten…). now we’re totally okay, and life is once again smooth. THANK GOD.

but while in remission, i was surprised by one of God’s infallible ways. my period was a few weeks delayed, and while contemplating on the remission, God gave me another reason to hold on to my marriage. i’m already 10 weeks pregnant with our 4th child.

the kids were so thrilled with the thought of a new baby. they were even the ones who informed Nanay and my sisters (and some neighbors, too!) that i am preggy. hubb was also excited, already thinking of the new set-up for the rooms. Ate and Kuya’s cannot stay in the same room as the baby.

and me? oh well… though i had some second thoughts at the onset, there was no doubt in my mind that this baby is a gift from heaven.  Motherhood is a privilege, a gift and an honor. and not everyone is as blessed and as capable of rearing a child.

on the financial aspect (which is also a major consideration), i am so blessed for being in a company that will shoulder my maternity concerns. my monthly consults with the OB is *FREE OF CHARGE* and our delivery package covers P20K for NSD, which is a substantial amount of financial assistance! oh, and there’s SSS maternity benefit, medical reimbursements for my meds, etc. etc. 

i am both excited and scared yet again. excited for the new baby (that i can almost smell his/her angel’s breath!) and scared at the thought of the gruelling childbirth since i’ve been through it 3x already. but there was no doubt in my mind that i’ll be able to succesfully give birth via NSD, i just know…

moving forward with life, i am trusting God’s ways for everything. now more than ever, i realized how important faith is. another pregnancy was not part of MY plans for this year, but since God has other plans for me, i don’t think i have right to question Him. and yes, there are no accidents.

i just pray fervently that this baby grow up to be strong, intelligent and healthy. 

;-)

Mother’s Day

may 10 is Mother’s Day!

just wanna share you the text messages i received yesterday…

“Hapy mother’s day!” greetings were pouring on my cellfone.

first honor is Choi / Jay, my friends and partners in the wedding coordinating biz who texted me at 8:14am.

2nd honor is my Ate Yam (3rd sibling) at 8:28am:

As a Mom, we earn no trophy, no medal, nor recognition. but in our heart we know that OUR FAMILY IS OUR BEST TROPHY… “happy mother’s day!!!” 

3rd honor is my Ate Ne (2nd sibling) at 8:51am:

[cute figure]

Sweet KISS n hug to a PRETTY MOM,

happy mother’s day!!!

YOU R SPECIAL!

:-)

4th honor is my boss, our Pres & CEO, who greeted me with a screaming,

‘HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY! from Tong’ at 8:51:35am.

other greeters:

My wish for you is good health, prosperity and forever happiness with your loved ones. HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY.

~ Weng Gonzales, cousin

Happy Mother’s Day to you!May God continue to give you strength, wisdom, blessings and love to be the best mom you can be! Enjoy your special day!

~ Tere de Mesa, officemate

Hope this day will be as wonderful as u want it 2b co’z u dserve2 have 1.

Have a happy MOTHER’S DAY!!!

~ Boleng, church choir mate

“Happy Mother’s Day!” from Sherlog at 10:39am; from Eva Cabellon and Gail Gustilo.

and from Dr. Chie and Ms. Elke, our AVPs.

[flower figure]

Fresh Flowers

For

A Very

Special Mom

who never fails 2 do d best 4 her family…

HAPPY Mother’s day.

~ Ate Me, my 4th sibling

Of ALL d earthly thing GOD gives there’s one above all others.

It is d precious priceless gift of Loving MOTHERS.

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY PO.

~ Ateng, my niece (who gave us our first apo)

It would take a thousand workers 2 build a caste,

a million soldiers 2 protect a country.

But it only takes 1 WOMAN 2 build a happy home.

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!

:-x

~ Girlfriend Marge, 1 of the Power of 3

Tnk u for greeting me. Happy mother’s day rin.

i love u too.

~ from my Nanay!!! 

Hapy mothers’ day to ol moms…Ü

~ Bimbz, one of the Charmed Ones 

Motherhood is a tough 24-hr job:

No pay, No day-off, most often unappreciated:

& yet resignation is impossible!

Happy TANGING INA DAY sa u!

~ Ate Mendot, ex-choirmate

Day Merl, gd pm. tnx 4d greetings.

yes that’s true, as a mother be a key and a light

in the home cos we are VIP 2d success of  our family.

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY.

~ Aunt Rosing, from Mindanao

Health, blessings, love, peace

are my prayers to u

happy mothers day!

God bless!

~ Mareng Joan, ex-choirmate

No man is poor who has had a godly mother.”

- Abraham Lincoln 

happy mother’s day to a great mom like you!!!

:-)

~ anonymous sender

Marami pong salamat. Hapi moms day to u 2!

Regards to all.

~ Libay, closest friend and ally

of course, i made my own composition in filipino, which was sent out to beloved moms on my cellfone list…

ikaw pa rin and ilaw ng tahanan, kahit na minsan, ikaw rin ang haligi…

sa nagbabagong panahon, dakila ka Inay!

maligayang araw ng mga Nanay!!!

;-) 

i’ve heard all mother’s day greetings, but the best greeting were the ones i got from my kids with matching super kisses and power hugsssss!!!

MOMMY is such a sweet, sweet word…

At 75…

i love Nanay dearly. 

she is my beacon, inspiration and light. she is THE biggest factor for what i am now and what i still hope to be. there are many things i love and adore about her, except one thing: FINANCES.

 
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Just Between You and Me…

i have something juicy to share. but promise me you’ll hush…

an officemate, a sweet girl named Aya, and her fiancée, Bryan, a former officemate, will tie the knot this December. 

AND I WAS INVITED TO BE NINANG!

i had chopsuey emotions — from feelings of surprise, disbelief, elation and finally sheer joy. i get to be Ninang sa Kasal for the first time!

awryt, so what if i’m only turning 35 years old? does that make me matrona-like and actually a candidate for being Ninang sa Kasal? 

it was a peculiar feeling and somewhat crazy. and i cannot help but smile at the thought! i can imagine how Luigi’s face will light up once i told him of the news… worse, i can almost hear his shrewd laughter!

haha, dammit! i am actually loving it and enjoying the feeling of being Ninang…

on a serious note, whatever Aya and Bryan’s feelings about me being a worthy one is something else. i’ve known them only for about 2 years and whatever trust, faith and confidence they see in me are more or less superficial (at least from my point of view). i feel that they have not known the real Me inside-out and may want to consider getting to know me first before deciding to make me a part of their married life.  that could be the reason for my authentic surprise.

i actually asked God ‘why me?’ and on a deeper level asked Him ‘WHY?’ and ‘am i worthy enough?’  it was totally mind-boggling for me considering the things i’ve been through in the past. i still feel that i am unworthy and unforgiven, and that i have been marked for eternity.

but of course, God’s plans are not my plans. He has laid down the path for my life such that i will live entirely according to His will. no if’s, no but’s, and no why’s. and that probably settles it.

there’s still 11 months to cope up and to get to know each other better. i might start opening up a little more about myself and they are most likely to see the many flaws about me. maybe they’ll change their minds. or worse, they may not. either way, our lives will begin to get interlinked from hereon.

meantime, i will have to re-process myself entirely and make myself a worthy Ninang that they can be proud of. 

WITHOUT EXPECTATIONS.

haaay… the perks of motherhood. 

Duds at 9!

birthday boy! 
my second child, Zoe Guille, celebrated his 9th birthday last 11/11.

we had a simple celebration with my sisters, nieces and nephews at Nanay’s house and enjoyed pancit (cooked by Nanay of course), a huge chocolate cake and a humongous pizza (c/o Jugnos Monsterpizza) to go with it. it was a simple, cozy and blissful family affair.

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Time Flies

how time flies!

(it’s my nth time to say ‘how time flies’ in this blog…)

sorry, i can’t help saying it because it really flies so fast that i am unable to grasp each passing minute! time flies because it does, and we cannot do anything about it…

and probably, the cliche’ is apt in itself: ‘Time flies when you’re having fun!’  (talk about Gloria Steffan’s 80’s song… or i’m getting old. geesh.)

MY KIDS ARE GROWING UP SO FAST!

 
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